Shadow
by Blitz Chick
Summary: ONESHOT SONGFIC! Kyo reflects on the past, and how a certian Tohru Honda has changed his life. And what he must do to move on.


I do not own Fruits Basket! I wish I did, and if I did, why would I be writing this? I do not own Ashlee Simpson, or her songs. Now you people might hate me for using a song of hers (that whole SNL thing…you know what I mean…) but I still think she's an impressive artist and this song seemed so perfect! Just perfect! So if you don't like it, tough. 

Kyo Sohma was taking the long way home from school. A very long way home. The orange haired youth climbed the stairs slowly and raised his head to look over a little grassy area that overlooked the main Sohma house.

_I was six years old_

_When my parents went away_

_I was stuck inside a broken life I couldn't wish away_

Sitting on the edge, he looked down below. The main house…that's where he'd spent the first few years of his life…where his mother had killed herself…all because he was the cat. And even though it had been years since that day, Akito and other family members continued to pound it into him that it had been all his fault.

Staring down the steep drop between him and the ground below, Kyo wondered if anyone would care if he threw himself off the cliff at that moment.

Then again, she would care….

_She was beautiful_

_She had everything and more_

Tohru would care, because that's how she was. Beautiful, caring, and Kyo's angel…the cat smiled at the thought of her. He could still remember the day they met. Then his smile faded as he remembered how he yelled at her before running away.

_And my escape was hiding out and running for the door_

_Somebody listen please_

_It used to be so hard being me_

Life had been so hard before then. Nobody except Shishou, his sensei, would really take the time to listen to what Kyo had to say. Then again, Shishou's grandfather had been the previous cat. But then again, as much as he hated to admit it, Yuki seemed to understand just a little bit of what he was going through. He had never seen his true form, but he had once mentioned that he knew it was hard for the cat to be scorned.

_Living in the shadow_

_Of someone else's dream_

_Trying to find a hand to hold _

_But every touch felt cold to me_

Even so…all the friends he had made…. Tohru, Uo-chan, Hana-chan…yes, maybe even Yuki…. that would all be crushed as soon as he graduated in a year. Damn Akito…

_Living in a nightmare_

_A never-ending sleep_

_But now that I am finally wide awake_

At least for now…he was free…there was no reason for others to pity him. Tohru didn't. Why should anyone else?

_My chains are finally free_

_So don't feel sorry for me_

A few leaves tumbled in the wind just beyond Kyo's reach. He watched them roll over and over, colliding with one another. So disorganized and chaotic. _Like my life…I'm never good enough…_ The brown eyed boy thought, watching as the wind swept them out into thin air.

_All the days collided_

_One less perfect than the next_

_I was stuck inside someone else's life_

_And always second best_

It was that damn Yuki's fault! If he hadn't tricked him… Then Kyo stopped. It wasn't Yuki…no…it was the very first rat…the one from the legend…hadn't he once said to Akito that he would smash his fate? Fate had dictated that he was to hate Yuki, but that was only because Yuki had been possessed by the rat. For all he knew, Momiji could've been the rat and he would've hated him just the same!

_Oh I love you now_

_Cause now I realize_

_That it's safe outside to come alive_

But still…it was a hard habit to break…after hating someone for so long…you can't just go and be their friend. But just that past summer…he had seen Yuki trying… He didn't pick fights with Kyo as much, and seemed to be trying to understand what the cat was like.

_In my identity_

_So if you're listening_

_There's so much more to me you haven't seen_

As much as he wanted to fight it, Kyo felt a tear slip down his cheek. It was a good thing he was alone. He hated it when thoughts like this were in his head. He always felt like crying when they came, and sometimes he actually did.

_Living in the shadow_

_Of someone else's dream_

_Trying to find a hand to hold _

_But every touch felt cold to me_

Times like these made the cat recall his mother, and what she would do. Sometimes his mother would hold his hand until he was done, but other times she would hug him and Kyo would transform.

_Living in a nightmare_

_A never-ending sleep_

_But now that I am finally wide awake_

_My chains are finally free_

_So don't feel sorry for me_

Smiling, Kyo stared out over the main house. He would never admit it, but he liked the times when his mother made him transform the best. Afterwards his mother and he would laugh about it.

_Mother, sister, father, sister, mother_

_Everything's cool now_

_Mother, sister, father, sister, mother_

_Everything's cool now_

Standing, Kyo noted that it was getting late. Tohru should be getting off work soon… He thought, and headed towards the building where he knew Yuki would normally wait for Tohru. When he approached, sure enough, the gray haired boy was leaning against a railing, staring in the opposite direction.

"Yo, rat."

Turning his head, Yuki seemed stunned that Kyo had shown up. "Hmm? What are you doing here, stupid cat?"

Opening his mouth to make a smart comeback, Kyo clenched his fist and closed his mouth. Change had to start somewhere, so why not with yourself? "I'm here to get Tohru."

Now Yuki seemed seriously shocked. "What?"

Brown eyes met gray. "You're always the one who's getting her from work, and didn't you say once that you were appalled that I never come to pick her up but I go out with Kagura?" He shuddered at her name. "So I'm here to get her! So you can go on home!"

"Home."

"Yes, home. I think I can get Tohru home from here!"

For only an instant, it seemed as if the rat would protest, but then he shook his head and the hint of a smile crossed his features. "All right then…I shall see you at home…Kyo-san."

Clenching his fists, Kyo glared at Yuki's retreating back. He had deliberately called him 'Kyo-san' because he knew that being called 'san' made Kyo twitch. But it was a start.

Almost a half hour later, Tohru emerged, waving over her shoulder to Momiji. Turning, her brown eyes grew wide when she spotted Kyo. "Ah, Kyo-kun!" She hurried over. "Where's Yuki-kun?"

Shrugging, Kyo took her bag. "I told him to go home. Besides, he's always the one who picks you up." After a moment of silence, Kyo looked sideways at Tohru. "What? Would you rather have him pick you up?"

Becoming flustered, Tohru kept up with Kyo. "Oh, no! I'm touched you'd come pick me up Kyo-kun!"

Seeing the brunette's face light up, Kyo smiled and led the way towards home.

_Oh my life is good_

_I got more than anyone should_

_Oh my life is good_

_And the past is in the past_

When the duo entered the shortcut through the woods to Shigure's house, Tohru stumbled, making a little noise. Like lightning, Kyo steadied her and took her hand.

"Be careful. It's dangerous this late at night."

"Y-Yes Kyo-kun…"

As they journeyed on, Kyo smiled at the warm hand he had held in his. It was nice, holding hands with someone who didn't flinch away.

_Living in the shadow_

_Of someone else's dream_

_Trying to find a hand to hold _

_But every touch felt cold to me_

"Kyo-kun, why are you smiling?"

Looking at Tohru, Kyo ruffled her hair. "You wanna know why?"

As she smiled, Kyo couldn't help but feel as if it lit up the night and people miles away could see the light that radiated from it.

"Oh yes please Kyo-kun! It makes me so happy when you tell me things like that!"

_Living in the new day_

_I'm living it for me_

_But now that I am finally wide awake_

_My chains are finally free_

_So don't feel sorry for me_

Holding her hand a little tighter, Kyo noted that he could see the lights in Shigure's house. "I'm free…for a little while."

Looking confused for only a moment, Tohru smiled sweetly at him. "That's good Kyo-kun. That's really good…"

Looking up at the stars, Kyo couldn't help but continue to smile. "It is…isn't it?"

Living in a new day 


End file.
